Mike Pence Honors the Trumpster for Being Mueller-Free

Now that the Mueller report is out, but not about, news reports about winning and losing fill the news feeds. Even Jay Sekulow, Trump’s faithfully legal, but nicely dressed, bulldog had something to say to Congress about sticking their noses in the Russian-Trump love affair. Mr. Sekulow thinks William Barr’s summary of Mueller’s report is gospel now. So he told Congress to butt out and drop their investigations into Trump’s business dealings with the Russians.

That would make Mr. Sekulow’s job a lot easier in 2019. But there is little chance Congress will listen to Trump’s attorney. Congress has a ton of information about Trump and his involvement with Russia. But they had to wait to see what Mueller had to say before they really got on Trump’s nerves.

Mueller didn’t want to piss all over the president by telling the world Mr. Trump didn’t perform as a true American when he obsessed over building a Trump Tower in Moscow. Mr. Trump’s interaction with Russians who have a connection to high-ranking Russians goes back years, according to the Washington Post.

More than four years ago, Don Jr. and Eric talked about how a lot of Russian money was available to them. And there’s a 2015 dossier about Trump that says he was in Moscow partying with those Russian connections. The wild call girl party Trump attended is unverified, but sources say Trump kind of likes people thinking he’s a sex object. He admitted that in his famous 2016 trailer interview.

Vice President Mike Pence had a lot to say to the Trumpster when he found out Mueller cut him some slack. Pence knew if Mueller shines a light on Trump’s he would have to admit he attended the Trump school of bullshit. Mr. Pence had one of “I hope God doesn’t strike me down for lying like I do” looks on his face when he went all-in of how truthful Trump is, and how evil the media and the Democrats are.

Mike actually turned his praise for the president into a campaign spiel that excited people who still think Pence practices what he preaches. But Pence has a lot of supporters, but most Republicans put up with him, and his strange robot-like persona.

But Mike’s not going back to Europe anytime soon. The Munich Security Conference was a real bummer for Mike. He found out for the first time how pissed Europe is at him. But Pence did get a shout out from an old Indiana political friend. His friend wanted to know why he loved Trump more than Jesus now that he’s the VP.

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